[/caption]Recent news tells us that almost half of all adults over the age of 18 in the United States are single, something that contrasts dramatically with the culture and customs of the 50’s and 60’s, a reflection of the times or perhaps a comment on how love is the bond and patience its ultimate reward.
Decades ago when a young man and woman wanted physical love, the ticket to social acceptability meant a band of gold for both. Going “all the way” might happen during the engagement period, but the message to youth was to wait. In the rush to satisfy that hunk of burning desire that Elvis, the titan of music once sang about to the 50-s and 60’s crowd, folks married young and regretted it later. Those regrets translated to a high divorce rate that left behind broken homes and hearts as collateral damage from the dissolution of passion replaced by the humdrum of life. And women broke bonds when they read about the Feminine Mystique, that underlined their plight and allowed them some freedom at last.
But where has love gone or has it? As the experts claim marriage is dying, young people continue to love. The love, however, has changed operationally, making it possible for all sorts of arrangements for living together and a myriad ways to behave. Indeed while the super culture where power is placed continues to advocate institutional patterns of loving, young people have moved on ahead. Marriage between one man and his woman might happen much later in life. Or the marriage might mean mates chosen from a widening pool of possibilities where gender choice options allows unions among same-sex couples or living arrangements where once-held taboos have dissolved.
These are ethical issues for many, as the new way drives some people apart. Still love is expressed in those options where race, religion, sex and culture are no longer barriers. For those 50’s and 60’s folks it was one man and woman, same faith and same culture, with the ideal the neighbor next door. Those same folks now wail of the difference their children have forged for their lives. But while marriages ended so sadly for parents who want life better for their children, perhaps waiting for marriage will mean more marriages last. So the eternal message mothers gave to their girls and fathers to sons years ago that waiting would have its rewards, if waiting simply means marriage, experts tell us that delay might be best after all. As the marriage rates are declining, so too is the rate of divorce.
