How can you be sexy in menopause?

Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russel--Cougar and cub

Carol Forsloff - "Feeling sexy and being sexually active is good for one's health and
sense of well-being.  It is good exercise and slows down aging."  That's the message of the American Association of Retired Persons and sex experts for menopause.

One of the most important ways a woman has of measuring her femininity is how sexy she feels, and there are some good reasons to be optimistic by following some scientific suggestions.

What social scientists and doctors say is that menopause should not signal the end of the love affair.  Great sex can occur after menopause,after the reproductive years and the frets and worries during that
period of time.

Some women expect to lose their sex drives after menopause,  but it isn't true it disappears.  Sexual intimacy is an ongoing thing and has many dimensions.  One's desire for sex doesn't decrease with age nor is it a symptom of menopause.

Indeed some women feeling sexier during and after menopause.  It's then, when there is a decline in men's function, and the need for a little more effort to be made in the experience, sex can still be satisfying for both partners.

Couples experiencing difficulty may want to seek out a sex therapist's advice.

Lack of desire at that certain age often accompanies certain physical and emotional factors, such as stress or depression.  This is why it is important for the woman to be open with her partner and her gynecologist.  Very often women don't want to talk about intimate issues with doctors, but doing so can help facilitate the solution for sexual dysfunction.  Experts tell us that the sex drive does not necessarily go away, and that the decline in desire is gradual.  And folks can perk it up with practice and playful interactions.

There are also ways to overcome vaginal dryness that affects some women's interest in sex.There are other aids to help the physical interaction during sex so that it is less painful.

Safe sex is also important to prevent transmitted diseases.

Experts remind us that healthy sex is healthy for the mind and body, especially during aging.  In fact they say because children are not around to interrupt and a couple have time to play together, sex can actually be better.  Besides there are new tools and a social permission slip from changes in the culture that unleash a variety of ideas for sex play and performance.

The conclusion from those who study safe sex with older adults and the function and satisfaction of sex life-long  is if you are saying to yourself  or your partner at menopause, you're too old for sex, you're wrong.  Think of some other excuse.

What are the best options for contraception?

Methods of contraception

Sue L. McBride — When it comes to protecting yourself against pregnancy, the method that you choose is as personal as your choice of sexual partner. What you need to know, before you choose, is that no method of protection is 100 percent effective. Whether due to user error or the type of product that you choose, the only sure protection is avoiding sexual contact. Because abstinence is an unrealistic choice for many people, you need to educate yourself about the protection that is available to you.

1. Latex Condoms

If you are sexually active outside of marriage or a long-term, monogamous relationship, you should use a latex condom every time you have sex. Are they romantic? Not especially. Are they effective? They are considered to be the most effective. When used properly, a condom is over 90 percent effective in preventing pregnancy and the transmission of STDs. No matter your gender, you should always have a condom with you; just in case.

2. Diaphragm

A diaphragm is a device that looks something like a small, latex bowl. It is placed inside of the vagina, effectively covering the cervix. While diaphragms can be somewhat effective in preventing pregnancy and the transmission of STIs, it is typically not suggested that they be used as a sole means of protection. User error with diaphragms is high and, while diaphragms can trap semen before it enters the cervix, bacteria can still enter the system through tears or cuts in the vaginal wall. Additionally, diaphragms do nothing to protect men against STIs.

3. Female Condom

Though the female condom has failed to become a popular choice among the sexually active, it is an effective means of preventing pregnancy and the spread of STDs. Working much like the male version, the female condom is inserted into the vagina before sexual intercourse. The device covers the cervix and lines the wall of the vagina. When used properly, the female condom is just as effective as the traditional, male condom.

4. Spermicide

When you couple a condom with spermicidal cream or jelly, you will be as protected as possible during sexual intercourse. Spermicide not only kills sperm, but it can kill many of the bacterium that is transferred during sexual intercourse. Spermicide may be applied directly to the condom or inserted into the vaginal canal; either method is an effective one. If you are unsure which spermicide is right for you, speak with your doctor or pharmacist.

5. Contraception

Do not confuse contraception and STD protection. Contraceptives like the birth control pill, patch, shot and ring do nothing to protect against sexually transmitted infections. While these products can protect against pregnancy and regulate the menstrual cycle, they will not protect against any STD. If you are using an oral, vaginal, or other type of hormonal contraceptive, you will need to use a barrier-type of protection, like a condom, if you want to protect yourself against STDs.

The protection that you choose should be a comfortable, easy-to-use and convenient one. If you choose a method that is unacceptable to your partner, find out why. If you don't feel that your partner's reason is good enough, find a new partner; it's your health that you're protecting.

And then there is abstinence.  Although some people maintain this is an extreme view of the problem, others see it as a reasonable alternative.  Whichever one is chosen, the emphasis is on that choice---or the degree of chance wants to take in avoiding pregnancy.



About the Author

Sue L. McBride writes public health articles.